CathyMoran's JournalD Day (12.2.2006, 19:53 UTC)
Well tomorrow the 13th of February is the 21st aniversary of me beeing diagnosed with type 1 diabetes - thus the “d day” in the title. It has had a major impact on my life, would be foolish if I said otherwise. When I was first diagnosed I became alergic to the animal insulin that I was then on and spent a few years of my life with terrible hives, perfect when you are doing your inter and leaving…and then there was all the miss guided press that all diabetics were fat (well ...
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CathyMoran's JournalSuper gran (11.2.2006, 22:02 UTC)
Argh, my personal life is down the sink and my gran could die any time now - am going for long walks listening to the Pixies on supehigh volume. I should mention my beloved gran in more details - she is an amazing lady, she is due to reach 100 next month (though unfortunatly it looks unlikely that she will make that date) - she should be an advert for whiskey as she has been having a tipple every day for quite a few years and we joke that she is preserved in it. She is witty and very with it ...
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CathyMoran's JournalLife is short (1.2.2006, 21:12 UTC)
I just found out today that the fiance of a girl that I knew in TCD was buried last week - I had intended to go to the funeral so am upset that I was not there for her…it does make you think…I end up thinking of how she had a life that was so full of him and now all she has are the wonderful memories…life is so short, you should make the most of it.
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CathyMoran's JournalWedding Journal - part 1 (28.1.2006, 23:24 UTC)
Well - I may as well start with one of the worst kept secrets around - smccarrick and I are getting married in early June this year - I had been hinting on this blog for a while but did not want to say it until we knew that it would be going ahead. So this is the first official post on our wedding blog and my personal experiences of same. Have been reading some other wedding diaries so I hope that this may be of some use (as well as being a personal log). First of all, the whole wedding thi...
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CathyMoran's JournalFinding the right river… (20.1.2006, 23:16 UTC)
Sometimes I can cut off my nose to spite my face, OK, I can do that a lot some times. My life is as strange as ever - was reminded of the family friend who died last year and ended up getting upset about him again - I think that we need to properly mourn him because at the moment tears well up in our eyes but for the most part we do not cry over him…so yesterday I ended up crying about him, this leads me into defensive mode and I try to curl up so that no one can hurt me, but of course t...
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CathyMoran's JournalWheels are not turning. (27.12.2005, 14:48 UTC)
Why do so many people seem pig ignorant about wheelchairs? Am just back from a lovely holiday with my parents and brother in a Dublin hotel, we decided to go to the sales…teenagers were trying to push out in front of my mum (in her wheel chair) from the lift and almost broke her nose as a result, most people just continued walking ahead and did not give the chair any space, and absolutely noone spoke to my mother directly, only to me…yes, my mum has a physical disability and yes sh...
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CathyMoran's JournalMisc. musings. (24.12.2005, 00:38 UTC)
My love life is confusing yet again, I knew that it was too good to last…all my friends have been playing devils advocate, they mean well and they are right but it really does do your head in at times…will respectfully keep silent on this except for the question of should you go with your heart or your head? On lighter news, I bumped into a close friend in town, we have both been busy so it was nice to spend some time with her, town is a throng of people and not that nice, I do not...
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CathyMoran's JournalBaby blues… (21.12.2005, 07:07 UTC)
Still moaping over my other half going on Thursday, he is only going for a week but it is Chritsmas week. Another friend is loosing his gf for a month so I know that I should consider myself lucky but it is still hard. I went Christmas card shopping today, it seems imposible to find a half decent card for loved one, they are all either crude or unsentimental; having to battle through the throngs of people does not help either. I had to sign a spouse pension protection form today, it seems ve...
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CathyMoran's JournalBaby blues… (21.12.2005, 00:02 UTC)
Still moaping over my other half going on Thursday, he is only going for a week but it is Chritsmas week. Another friend is loosing his gf for a month so I know that I should consider myself lucky but it is still hard. I went Christmas card shopping today, it seems imposible to find a half decent card for loved one, they are all either crude or unsentimental; having to battle through the throngs of people does not help either. I had to sign a spouse pension protection form today, it seems ve...
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CathyMoran's JournalTeddy bears… (18.12.2005, 23:23 UTC)
Had a bittersweet weekend. Still going to the physio - mixture of bad posture since recent accidents and being self conscious about my chest and having a tough few years., is going to get a lot more painful before it gets better. My American baby cousin was over for the weekend, we went out together with some of the other cousins in the afternoon and then went to a pub later in the evening. There are a group of cousins that I have that have been like siblings to me, I only have my brother so...
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CathyMoran's JournalMum and dad (13.12.2005, 22:19 UTC)
Well, today was the big day. Mum was in having her cerebral angiogram and daddy was going about his cancer scare. Talk about having a lot on at the same time. I rang daddy at 5am as promised to make sure that he was up and then went to sleep until 6am…got to the hospital just after 9am (after spending 2 hours in traffic) and saw daddy leaving for his appointment. Then the long wait for mum to get out of surgery, I must have gone up to her bed 10 times or more before she arrived back. ...
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CathyMoran's JournalHouses for couches (10.12.2005, 19:03 UTC)
Spent this morning in physio, I have been having pains in my arms since an accident a few months ago, was told that it could be torn ligaments but either way I should go to a physio. I finally went, it turns out that I have been having bad posture for years - it makes sense, I have a fairly large chest and tend to crouch as a result. May get a few inches taller if I stand straight, but for the next few weeks it is going to be very painful. Mums cerebral angiogram was delayed, will hopefully ...
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CathyMoran's Journal20’s regrets (5.12.2005, 22:45 UTC)
Met a very close friend today - he is a really cool wonderful guy who I have been friends with for years, in so far as you can truely love someone in a platonic way I love this man, he is family. In any case, it is his birthday today so I just wanted to say “Happy Birthday” again to him. He did get me thinking about the past again - looking back I did not like my 20’s much, I know that I was very imature, did some things that I regret like getting my heart broken due to my o...
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CathyMoran's JournalFor Flying Flips Sake… (4.12.2005, 17:19 UTC)
Was enjoying the glow of being in a revived relationship - reality had to strike at some time. First, we went to see the house again that we really love…all good there, but then the large morgage sets in. I do not want too huge a morgage as I want to take some time to enjoy being a mum if we are fortunate enough, being a diabetic will mean that I will need extra monitoring during a pregnancy also. Then I went into town shopping today, maybe a bad idea - I was trying to get a birthday...
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CathyMoran's JournalUnexpectidly in love… (30.11.2005, 22:48 UTC)
I think that I may be in love - I feel like I have eaten two big bars of high coco solids chocolate and while I do not get goose bumps I think that I may be (shock, horror) settling down, doing the big horrible C word (comitment). It is someone that I have known for 8 years and we are thinking of buying a house together…do not want to go into more details now as I do not want to jinx it but let us just say that there may be an announcement soon (no, not a baby, not doing the right exerci...
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CathyMoran's JournalRants and chocolate (24.11.2005, 22:51 UTC)
Well I have been doing my best to avoid thinking about mums check on her anyursms (which in itself carries a risk of death/furthe brain injury) but the time is coming closer and I must admit that when I think about it I get quite upset, so I am doing my best not to think about it…but it shows. Mum is in good form - she really is an angel and we are so lucky to have had this time with her. Well, I should find out soon in work if I have been made permanent - hopefully, I really like where...
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CathyMoran's JournalInsulin (15.11.2005, 23:59 UTC)
OK, my little or big deal is that I am a type I diabetic - have been that for over 20 years, it is so much a part of my life that I forget about it for the most part except for taking care of it but it is not my life. I have the type that is NOT relate to obesity, my BMI is only 20. I knew that I would have to keep a close eye on it for my 30’s as I knew that I would want kids at some stage - keeping to very strict blood sugar limits which is a real pain (keeping to the normal ones is n...
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CathyMoran's JournalSugar (11.11.2005, 18:19 UTC)
I woke up this morning with the song “If I can’t change your mind” by Sugar, one of my all time favorite songs - it set the scene for the day. I have been very concerned about going to Paris with the riots and the concern would just not go away so I decided to cancel the trip. It was very upsetting to do it but I made the right call. Am still taking a few days off work though, I need a holiday after being sick all of last weekend.
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CathyMoran's JournalEvil Nurses (8.11.2005, 21:15 UTC)
Some nurse just really irritated me - I was asking was it OK for dad to see his mum outside the visiting hours explaining how ill mum is and how hard it is for him to get to her, the little upstart saying that they can not make exceptions, FFS! Sorry that is my little rant… we have been treated with compasion over mum in most cases but this is rediculous. It is going to be even harder next month if they decide to operate on mum after the cerebrocardioangiogram which in itself carries ri...
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CathyMoran's JournalAunt troubles (6.11.2005, 21:00 UTC)
After me being selfish moaping about a cold I have just found out that my favorite aunt (who I consider to be more like a sister even though she is only 2 years younger than my mum) was taken into hospital with high blood pressure, she was since released but has to go for further tests - still, it is not good. I really, really love my aunt, she has always been far more to me than that - I was only speaking to her on Wednesday but thankfully I always tell her how much I love her, I did cry when...
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CathyMoran's JournalSniffle, sniffle, sniffle… (6.11.2005, 13:22 UTC)
Really sniffley today - I had hoped to see my gran over the weekend but would not go into her with this - I may still see mum and dad though as mum gave this cold to me so at least she can not get it back from me. I would always at the very least go out for a walk if feeling unwell but this has really floored me…still, I plan to be back in work tomorrow. Hopefully I can take a half day later in the week to see gran, so what if it is from annual leave. Need to eat more, my weight is a...
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CathyMoran's JournalBooks from the past. (31.10.2005, 21:58 UTC)
I spent time over the weekend sifting through books from my parents house, they are planning on selling the place and moving into somewhere smaller and more manageable though my brother and I will always have a room to stay in. I have so many books, I do not like throwing them out as when I think back on a book I think of the time when I read it, who gave it to me or why I bought it as well as the actual contents itself. The topics were very diverse from astronomy to philosphy. One book was ...
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CathyMoran's JournalGran update. (27.10.2005, 21:18 UTC)
Gran is back in hospital - it does not look like she will be living by herself again. It is obviously a shock. The cancer appears to be more vigorous than previously thought and she is fading fast. Have been checking the hospital at least twice a day how she is and will be seeing her tomorrow afternoon. I still am refusing to believe it as my mum survived against all odds but I know that she is going.
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CathyMoran's JournalOne little step at a time. (23.10.2005, 22:04 UTC)
Dad and I got back to normality for a short while and had a Sunday afternoon like we did before mum got ill…strange how comforting it was and it was nice to get to talk to dad just by myself. I still do not have a clue what I am doing in my personal life which is typical of me, though I bumped into someone I used to work with when I had a particularly nasty break up (an ex cheated on me and treated me really badly before I found out that he was being unfaithful) and it did bring up bad...
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CathyMoran's JournalGood news. (20.10.2005, 19:39 UTC)
My MRI results came back all clear. Am glad that I went for the test, there was sufficient family history and it is great to know that I do not have any anyursms. Was able to tell my family and they are glad that I do not have them - even told mum and she understood. My parents retirement was cut short by mums illness and they have always said that I should enjoy my life in the now, I still intend on doing that, have Paris booked for next month. Is a great relief.
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CathyMoran's JournalFlowers in the window. (17.10.2005, 22:03 UTC)
Looking forward to Paris, is sad that sometimes we wish our life away but at the moment I really wish that the 3rd of November (when I get the MRI test results) was over. Paris is one of the few places apart from Dublin and Kildare that I feel is home. My daddy described Paris in detail to me when I was a kid (he had to go there on business trips once a year), so when I finally saw it with my parents at the age of 23 I felt like I knew it, it was even more beautiful than I imagined. It will ...
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CathyMoran's JournalShyness is nice but… (13.10.2005, 21:19 UTC)
If I am nervous I tend to talk before I think, not normally the best idea…I also can give people the benefit of the doubt too many times and insist on seeing the best in people even if they are just better off avoided/ignored. Shyness really can be a pain at times, my way of dealing with it (talking first…) means that it takes a while to get to know me - though it means that it is easier to spot the other shy people. Just got hurt by two people today in different ways…you li...
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CathyMoran's JournalThe big crunch (11.10.2005, 20:54 UTC)
Had the MRI today. You have to make sure that you have NO metal on you, not even eyeshaddow and you have to wear a hospital gown when you are getting it done. You are in a narrow tube, it is fairly noisy but they give you ear plugs - I actually found it quite relaxing and ended up meditating in there. It was expensive but I am still glad that I went for it. I should get the results by the 3rd of November at the latest. Afterwards I was a bit freaked about it, but not that much - I have see...
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CathyMoran's JournalChanges… (9.10.2005, 18:03 UTC)
Stil a bit nervous about Tuesday, yes, it is all very well saying that it is only a test which it is and while I am almost certain that I do not have any anyursms and have planned what to do if I have them it is still a bit scary. My brother and I had a silly disagreement yesterday also (though thankfully we got over it), I hate rows. Mummy visited the local hospital on Friday, everyone was amazed at how well she is…one of the nurses said that we are a very close family and I suppose ...
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CathyMoran's JournalAkward moments. (6.10.2005, 19:32 UTC)
Firstly, gran went home today and is in great form. Tuesday is my big day, getting the MRI at 8am in the morning allegedly, will see…it looks like I will not get any of the money back from my health insurance, ironically if I get a bad result my brother will…it is expensive, so I was slightly procrastinating over getting it done but in the end peace of mind is priceless…so bye, bye 500Eur odd, ah well…I should get the results about 3 weeks later when I go to my consulta...
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